Dreams

Recently a reporter from a local Chinese newspaper wrote about how she was having a very difficult time with her recent assignment. Her assignment was to interview middle age folks about their dreams.

Folks have answers like I hope my dd will get into the local Uni or my ds will become a very good doc etc. But when the reporter told them this is not what she wanted- she wanted them to tell her their own dreams, not about their ds or dd- they just look at her blankly...the reporter wondered does parenthood took away the ability to dreams?

I don't know, does it?

What is your dream?

The question has been on my mind for many days because I don't have a ready answer for it.

In my case, it is not so much of parenthood took away my ability to dream. When I look back I have never been much of a dreamer. Growing up in a typical Chinese family in modern time, I've been taught to be logical, sensible and the impractical dreams are for the fools.

Growing up I don't have any vision and ambition for my life, I never dream of what I want to be... I only know I don't want to be a mon and I don't want to be a teacher. Isn't that ironic that I'm both now?

I want Den to dream big, to dream the impossible. I find biographies helps a lot. Reading about how others achieve the impossibles help her to see the possibility in achieving hers.

She has been saying she want to be a scientist but not sure in which field. So whenever we read about something that even the current scientists are still puzzled about, she will right away say, "May be that is the field I should go into!" ^^

But then how about me? Shouldn't I be dreaming for my self too? How do I teach her to dream when I dont?

So I've been contemplating on that. What do I really really hope/wish to do? What is the thing I will really regret I didn't do when I lie in my death bedt? Not looking at the achieve-bility but what my heart really want. I've a few possibilities but I'm actually not sure those are really what I want. So I'm going to think them over and hopefully will find one that I want to focus on.

No, I'm not sharing my dream here.